Women on top.

DAY 6                                                                                                         16th-MAY-2014

Disclaimer- DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU ARE EASILY OFFENDED.

When you read this post you might think that I am a stupid stuck up feminist who thinks all men have their heads in their pants, well this is a free country, you have the freedom of thought, think what you want. But sadly you do not have the freedom to change the way I think.

Whoever said nothing hurts more than a broken heart, for sure has not had the pleasure of sitting through a Brazilian wax session.  People call women the weaker sex, I am going to elucidate why women are most definitely not the weaker sex, I am not going to quote examples like the pain of child birth because that would be like stating the obvious. The heights that we go in order too get a few “oh fucks” is madness.

The pain of womanhood.

Until  you reach adolescence everything is fun and games, from there everything goes downhill.

The obsession with looking “beautiful” makes us do crazy things.

What goes through our minds when we get these “beauty treatments” done.

• Plucking out our eyebrows- it will all be worth the “ooh what a lovely forehead”

                                                   Reality- ooh boobs nice J

•  Threading the upper lip –son of a bitch,this better be worth a few “babe u hot as hellsss”

                                            Reality-oh what is that I see??Boobs.

•  Waxing, I have to break this into different categories

1. Arms – no big deal, it’s a pity I have only two hands.
2. Legs-hurts as fuck, but it will be worth the stares I get  when I fit into that skirt that I got for my 24 months old niece.
3. Underarms – why god why did you make me a girl, why can’t I be a dirty old boy.
4. The hoo ha – he better hand me a 2 karat diamond ring when this is done. He should also no that after the diamond ring i never going near anything that is Brazilian.

                  Reality – oh that is a nice rack, I would bang that,yeah toatally.

•  Removing blackheads- tell me why I am doing this again, oh yeah because I  want to be the prettiest of them all.

              Reality- that girl had a face?? I must have missed it while gaping at the itty bitty you-know-what.

See here is the thing about us girls, if we commit ourselves to something we would go to any

extent to achieve perfection, well we try.

As if plucking out your hair and pulling out blackheads (African-american heads, I am not a racist) was not enough we go through the pain of cosmetic surgery

 1.Boobs and ass- need implants, tissue paper is not doing the job as well as I would like it to do.

2.Cheeks-need some botox, here is a tip,buttocks is what they want.

 3.Lip – well if had bigger lips, it would make no difference.

4.Tummy  tuck- what tummy? What is this tummy you speak of?

And then we do what we do best ;accessorize:

• Ear lobes- need a hole in them, nose-needs a hole,navel-a small hole would look nice on the bigger.

        Reality – oh well what do we have here? Boobs,I am already banging her in my head.

I am sure after reading this girls would go crazy and get a promise ring from Mr.Denial. People might  even start talking about inner beauty and all that jazz ,while getting their arms waxed. You can hate me all you want, but sadly you know I am speaking the truth. We do a lot of these things for attention,which is perfectly fine,a little attention did not kill anyone, but when we go nuts about our looks totally ignoring our personality and character that is when things get dirty and that is when we lose the respect that we rightfully deserve.

If only we paid a little less attention to looking bang-worthy and paid some more attention to grooming ourselves from within, we would all be “women on top”. In every way.

no boob talk can be complete without a guest apperance of neethus "galz: :D :D 

Stay stoned until next time.

Xo-

shuu